Process of Elimination
by RainbowDiamonds
Summary: Logan has a secret crush that he'd die before ever admitting, and a school project gives him the opportunity to say it without actually saying it. But when the plan backfires, what will his crush do about it? Logan/James. This is for the Valentine challenge from the BTR Plot Adoption Forum.
1. Chapter 1

A/N—So I just now saw that there are rules for this, and I'm hoping this still fits in the "has to be BTR-verse" requirement; this would be taking place before the whole Gustavo thing, obviously. I think everything else in here works for the rules. If not, I apologize. It was supposed to be a one-shot but got a little wordy (as all my stories do), so I'm breaking it up into two chapters. I'll post the second one tomorrow.

Thanks to my wonderful, awesome beta for reading this over and making it better. Her biggest problem with it was "I want to know what happens next!", so if I leave you feeling the same way, I've done my job. :P

I'll continue posting "Magic" later in the week, for those wondering. Thank you for reading!

* * *

"Dude, will you come on already? I don't want to be late!"

Though what Logan wanted to do was continue to drag his feet, he quickened his steps a tad—just enough to hopefully get Carlos off his back, because Carlos' excitement only added to his dread. Yes, Carlos was excited; Logan had listened all through lunch while his best friend attempted to guess what surprise was waiting for them in history class today. Would they be writing love poems? Eating chocolate hearts? Passing out roses? Or Carlos' personal favorite, dressing up like Cupid while doing all of the above?

Logan had put a stop to the guesses after that one, grossed out by the visions it brought to mind; the last thing he needed to be picturing was his entire history class running around in diapers and not much else.

Although, there was one student...

_Stop it. Just don't even go there. It's never gonna happen._

That was true, but it didn't make Logan's crush go away. Being a logical sort, he would've expected that the knowledge it would never happen was enough to put a stop to the feelings that flared up every time his crush walked into the room. It made no sense to pine after someone you knew you'd never have.

And yet...

It was still there. Two years in, it was still there. The secret Logan would die before admitting to a soul, the daydreams he only allowed himself to give into late at night when no one was around to see. No amount of arguing with himself about it made the feelings go away.

Valentine's Day always made it worse, as it was a reminder of things he'd never have. Valentine's Day_ with Miss Newton_ promised to be even more torture.

Miss Newton had a healthy respect for her subject, as did Logan. History was important. People learned from their mistakes, and by studying what went wrong in the past they could (hopefully) have a better future. It made sense. Most of the time Logan enjoyed Miss Newton's class and even did extra credit simply for the reason that he liked doing the research.

Holidays, though...holidays were a little scary in her class. She liked to spice things up a little bit, to use history in a way that related to current times. She called it "fun." Hell, even Carlos called it fun.

Logan called it torture.

Halloween had been their first introduction to her madness. He hadn't minded the research portion of it so much, as he'd never really learned the origins of the holiday and found it fascinating.

What he hadn't counted on was the participation involved. They were instructed to either make or buy masks to wear in class on Halloween in order to honor those who began the tradition of dressing up to frighten the ghosts and demons away. The only condition was that it couldn't be fun or cute, it had to actually be scary or it ruined the theme. Logan had gone out and bought a stupid devil mask. Carlos showed up in a clown mask, explaining when asked that "Clowns are evil, man!"

Miss Newton let him by with that.

Thanksgiving came next, and along with learning about all of the horrors that Columbus inflicted on the indigenous people of America, they had a potluck in class and all brought dishes that were said to be served at the first Thanksgiving (or "whatever you guys eat at home"). She provided the turkey, at least.

Logan was a little nervous about Christmas, wondering if she'd make them dress up as elves, but instead they'd learned that Saint Nicholas was once a real person who became loved for his selfless acts of giving gifts secretly. So that wasn't too bad, and there had been a gift exchange where Logan drew Carlos' name and ended up having to buy him a second present, as he'd already purchased a gift for his friend.

All in all, not a bad time, though.

Now they were walking into Valentine's Day. Logan had researched over the weekend in an attempt to prepare himself and discovered that the man known as Valentine had also been a saint, one who performed marriages in secret when the emperor forbade the act. Logan's skin crawled at the idea that Miss Newton might have them stand up before the class and perform mock weddings. No way would he stand next to someone and pretend to be in love, possibly even be forced to kiss his random partner.

There _was_ one student, though...

But no._ No. _ He needed to just get that idea out of his head, and quickly before Carlos picked up on his thoughts and asked why he was blushing.

Speaking of Carlos, he was now seated and practically bouncing in anticipation. "I hope it's the chocolate hearts!" he whispered. "I only got three cookies in my lunch!"

"Right, along with that sandwich and bag of chips, you must be starving." Logan rolled his eyes and opened his backpack, stomach twisting as he pulled out a notebook. He really wasn't ready for this.

A carefree laugh from outside the door jolted Logan's stomach. That was Kendall, the jock who sat in front of Carlos. And if Kendall was here, that meant...

Sure enough, James Diamond sauntered into the room behind his best friend. His dark bangs lifted as he shook them out of hazel eyes, then settled right back down over his forehead. Logan felt his skin tingle as that gaze touched him in passing, as it always did, but it meant nothing. He shared two other classes with James and it was the same in each one—James' eyes did a casual pass around the room upon entering. Five seconds later the tall body fell into the desk in front of Logan, who purposely avoided staring at the shiny hair that hung down to rest against the collar of James' light blue t-shirt.

James tended toward pastels, which Logan liked so much more than primary colors. He always felt that the brighter colors might camouflage the inner beauty hidden inside those clothes, whereas the softer tones seemed to make James glow.

Or maybe he was putting way too much thought into that.

"Guys, what do you think our project is gonna be?" Carlos hissed. "I'm voting chocolate hearts."

Kendall spun around and frowned at Carlos. "What are you even talking about?"

James chuckled, though, and turned to face them. "The Valentine's thing, right? Didn't she say we were starting on that today?"

"Oh god, I forgot," Kendall sighed. "Lord help us all. As long as she doesn't stick me up there in a diaper and wings, I'll survive."

"I had that thought, too!" Carlos exclaimed. "We could all go around shooting arrows at each other!"

"Carlos, she's not going to have us shooting things around the classroom," Logan scolded.

"They can be Nerf arrows!"

Kendall snickered, James doing the same before adding, "Maybe she'll pick one volunteer to run around and be Cupid."

"I'd totally do that!"

Kendall laughed louder this time. "Somehow I'm not surprised."

"Come on, you'd be so jealous. I'd get to be half-naked and shooting people with shit."

"With _love_," James corrected. "You'd be spreading love. And aww, isn't that romantic?"

But he said it in a mocking way, as if romance and love were things to be laughed at. Thinking now of all the girls who were constantly flocking to James for attention, Logan felt a little sorry for them. Mostly he hated them, but he did feel sorry for them because James never seemed to care much for their feelings.

Just one more reason to forget about him.

Class was called to order. Miss Newton spent half the period continuing where they'd left off the previous week, lecturing about the American Revolutionary War and the effects it had on the rest of the world (which surprisingly, were many). With about twenty minutes remaining, she told them to "Close your books and open your hearts."

Logan's sped up with dread.

"That's right, we're talking about Valentine's Day! Which is Thursday, so you have a few days to prepare. I'm sure many of you already have plans with loved ones, and even if you don't you know all about it. But where did all this start? Who was the first person to actually hand out a 'Valentine'? Why is it even called that? Well, it all began with a priest who refused to let love die even when his government tried to put a stop to it."

As Logan had already learned all of this, he only half-listened to the lecture and studied the faces of his classmates, who seemed genuinely interested for once. Then again, love touched everyone. Carlos was enthralled. Even Kendall, who usually had some snide remark to make under his breath, was paying close attention. Logan only wished he could see James' face. Did James find this boring? Stupid? A waste of time?

Eventually Logan tuned back in. "So here's what we're gonna do. Now I know you all think you're too old for this, being sophomores and all, but it's a time-honored tradition that began when St. Valentine handed over his first note and signed it with his name. So we're going back to that. Remember back in grade school when you guys used to pass out Valentines to everyone in the class?" A series of groans reached her and she smiled wider. "Yep. I'll hand out a student roster to each of you and when you come in Thursday, we're going to pass out Valentines just like we did all those years ago."

"Can we get the candy ones?" Carlos called out. "My mom always buys those for my sisters. They actually come with candy!"

"Whatever you want," Miss Newton laughed. "You can make them or buy them, but I expect you to have one for each member of the class."

Kendall asked, "Can we just sign our name on each one and be done with it?"

"Well yes, Kendall, if you want to take all the fun out of it. As long as you have one for each student, that's fine. And hey, why not put a little effort into it for a change?"

"Hey, I do okay! I pass my tests, don't I?"

"Barely," James snickered, earning a kick from his friend.

"Oh, look who's talking. I at least get C's on my work."

"Shut up, I get B's in this class! It's just all the other ones I suck at."

That was probably true, Logan thought. James tended to get that glazed look and slouch down in the other classes they shared, but he sat up straight in this one and seemed to be paying attention most of the time. Maybe a love of history was something they had in common.

It would be nice to have one thing.

Miss Newton's voice broke into his musing. "Okay, the bell's about to ring so grab the roster up here on your way out. Guys, have fun with this! Don't be in such a hurry to grow up! Go shop for Valentines!"

"Well, I guess I was sort of right," Carlos commented as they stood to gather their belongings.

"How so?" Kendall wondered.

"One of my ideas was that she'd make us write love poems. I mean, it's not exactly that, but it's still giving out love notes. Too bad I don't have a crush or I could write a real love note."

Kendall smirked and hefted a gym bag over his shoulder. "You would totally do that, wouldn't you?"

"Duh. I can't wait to get a girlfriend."

"You've never had one?" James asked curiously. "You're what...fifteen?"

"Just turned sixteen," Carlos answered proudly. "And no, I don't have a lot of luck with the ladies. They all think I'm just a big kid," he shrugged.

James smiled. "Well, don't give up. There's someone out there for everyone."

Kendall made a "psh" sound. "You can say that, you've got a different girl after you every week."

"Must be nice," Carlos commented.

"It's...what it is. Come on, bro, we can't be late to math again."

"See you guys," Kendall waved. "And Carlos, I'd better get candy with my Valentine."

"Nothing but the best from me," he winked. "Logan, want to stop at the store with me after school so we can pick out our Valentines?"

Logan was barely listening. His gaze followed long brown hair out of the room, mind stuck on something Carlos had said.

_Too bad I don't have a crush or I could write a real love note._

Kendall had mentioned signing his name on each Valentine, but no one had said they _had_ to, right?

Maybe Miss Newton's madness could work in his favor.

* * *

Logan begged off of shopping with Carlos, citing "too much homework" as the reason. It wasn't a complete lie, as he did have a ton of homework; what he neglected to mention was that he'd finished most of it in study hall.

It was time alone he needed, and lots of it most likely, because "love notes" weren't his forte. They weren't even something he'd ever considered before. He didn't know how a note for James was supposed to advance his cause, since he had no intention of signing the damn thing, but he thought it might be nice for James to know that someone found him...

_Attractive _wasn't the right word. _ Beautiful_ didn't even come close. James Diamond was...

_Radiant. _That was a good word for it, and thank God Logan wasn't going to attach his name to this. How to write a poem explaining that James was radiant? You couldn't even rhyme anything with it, except maybe _gradient_, and Logan didn't think that word fell under the umbrella of poetry.

Phrases tumbled through his mind for the remainder of his walk home after parting from Carlos, and by the time he arrived there he thought he maybe had a skeleton of a poem created. It would be cheesy, and it would be lame, but it would get across the idea that James had someone who appreciated him, and wasn't that was Valentine's Day was all about?

_It's not about appreciation, Logan, it's about love. The married kind of love that you believe in so strongly you're willing to defy your government and do it in secret._

Well, he didn't know James well enough for that yet, so this would have to do.

Surprisingly, it only took Logan an hour to compose the finished product once he sat down at his desk to work on it in earnest. When it was done, he read it again with a more critical eye, cringing through half of it but hoping James would like it anyway—even if it came off more like an essay than a sappy card you'd buy in a store.

_There are different kinds of beauty, and varying degrees of attraction. _

_Some are beautiful on the inside, by way of kindness, generosity, and compassion. Others stop traffic with their outward beauty, and command the attention of every eye in the room. Then there's the beauty that shines out of someone no matter what they do or how they look, because it's innate and radiates from every pore, shining like the glitter of a glowing diamond._

_You possess all of the above._

_There are different kinds of attraction, and varying degrees of love._

_For some, a smile might be all they ever show as proof of their attraction. In others it's obvious with a look or a laugh. Some turn red and avert their eyes instead. The heart quickens, the hands start to sweat, breathing is suddenly a struggle and everything seems just a little more beautiful._

_When you walk into a room, I possess all of the above._

_There are different kinds of love, and varying degrees of devotion._

_When love is new, it is at its most thrilling and scary. Every word is like an anvil trying to drop through a cloud—at once dangerous and magical. Hands are held, kisses are stolen, glances hold a thousand secret thoughts. We speak of love best through touch, because words cannot begin to explain what our hearts wish to share._

_My touches with you are innocent, seemingly nothing more than the course of another mundane day, but each brush of my fingers against your skin, or even your clothing, is my heart sharing without words that I wish to love you._

_And my devotion is of the highest degree. For you I would defy the world and wed in secret, because now that I know your radiance, I could not live without it._

It was horrible. It was lame. But it was from the heart, and Logan would have to be satisfied with that.

He only hoped James would be, too.

* * *

"So my biggest problem is do I go with chocolate or sour gummies?"

Logan allowed his attention to be pulled from the classroom entrance long enough to glance over at his best friend. "You have both?"

"Yeah. Some people don't like chocolate. How is that even possible?"

"Well, it depends on your—wait, shouldn't you already have the little cards filled out with names?"

"I couldn't decide! So I'm just gonna write the names on the envelopes instead of taking notes on the lecture. I can look at your notes later."

An eye roll was Logan's reply. "That's if I let you." His breath caught as James turned into the room, this time not with Kendall but instead no less than four girls fighting for his attention. He laughed easily at something they said but was thwarted in his attempt to escape to his desk when they surrounded him on all sides.

And now here came Kendall, looking annoyed and perhaps a little envious as well. He dropped into his seat and muttered, "Can't even go two minutes without getting swarmed. I don't get it. He's hot and all, but he obviously doesn't like any of them. Why can't they see that?"

"Girls are stupid," Carlos answered. "Kendall, do you like chocolate or sour gummies?"

"Both. What you got for me?"

"Well, you don't get it yet, you have to wait until we pass out the Valentines! But you only get one."

"Am I not special enough for two, Carlos? How many times have I saved your ass from getting kicked when you shoot off your mouth?"

"But I only have one for each student!"

"Whatever. If you really loved me, you'd find a way."

Kendall faced forward as if offended, following that with an exaggerated wave of his hand. Carlos grinned, the thousand secret thoughts in his eyes reminding Logan of his poem.

Which he'd never get to slip into James' bag if the guy didn't sit down.

The arrival of Miss Newton broke up the "I love James Diamond more than you do" party going on near the door. Logan watched carefully as James slid into his seat (after that cursory passing glance that skated over Logan's red face) and bent down to unzip his gym bag. A textbook was lifted out, and to Logan's relief the fabric remained unzipped.

It would be easy to slip the card into that bag. Logan had eventually purchased a generic "Happy Valentine's Day" card at the store, and then printed his poem on the inside cover. He didn't think James would recognize his handwriting; it wasn't as if James had any reason to study it when passing papers back.

_You can do this. While everyone's walking around passing out Valentines, just slip it in his bag. That way when he finds it, it could've been anyone._

The idea was smart, Logan mentally patting himself on the back.

Ten minutes into class, Carlos slid a note onto his desk.

"_Would you be mad if I gave your candy to Kendall? I'll make it up to you later."_

Logan's lips curved up. Carlos had indeed found a way. He answered back.

"_It's cool. But I demand a full-sized candy bar on the way home to make up for the delay."_

After reading that, Carlos furtively gave him a thumbs up.

A chance to tell James how he felt _and_ a Snickers bar? This whole Valentine's thing was turning out better than he'd imagined.

* * *

Except that in the end, it was a disaster. It was actually worse than he could've predicted, because as he sat in study hall going through his pile of little Valentine cards for the fourth time, he was forced to face what his brain (mostly his heart, if he was honest with himself) didn't want to accept.

James had not given him a Valentine.

Out of everyone in class, it was_ James _who skipped him. The guy he laid awake in bed at night thinking about. The guy he fought to keep his eyes off of in three separate classes. The guy he'd written poetry for just to try to explain his feelings.

James Diamond didn't even think he was good enough for a stupid little Valentine card.

_It was an honest mistake. He's not a cruel person, he just accidentally skipped your name when going down the list. It happens._

It still hurt. Logan's chest was on fire from the effort to keep tears from falling.

He suddenly whipped out his phone, grateful that this was the one class they were allowed to use them in, and sent a text to Carlos.

"_Did you get a Valentine from everybody?"_

"_Duh, that was the rules. Kendall even actually wrote my name on mine and drew a heart. He admitted it was only to tease me since he knows I like that stuff, but still. It's so cute!"_

Logan sighed. Carlos was getting hearts without even trying, and he couldn't even get a "From: James." It _hurt._

"_Wait why? You got one from everybody, right?"_

"_Not James. I guess he really doesn't like me."_

"_James didn't give you one? That's weird. He's actually pretty nice."_

"_I know! Have I ever done anything to make him hate me?"_

"_Nah, he's cool with you. I mean you guys don't talk much or anything, but he seems cool with you."_

"_Whatever. It's just a stupid thing for class."_

"_Forget about him. Just think about the chocolate I'm gonna buy you later."_

Well, there _was _still that. Logan supposed it was better than nothing.


	2. Chapter 2

A/N—Yay, thanks for the reviews on this so far, guys! I'm glad everyone's enjoying it. Here's part two, and I want to wish you all a Happy Valentine's Day. Whether you're single or taken, it's a day to celebrate love of all kinds, and without love in this world we really would be screwed. Tell someone you love them!

* * *

"Dude, what's with you? You've barely said anything since lunch."

James shrugged, not wanting to talk about it. He sure as hell couldn't tell Kendall what was bothering him. Kendall wouldn't understand.

"Don't ignore me. You're upset about something. Come on, we'll be at my house in like five minutes, what's going on?"

"Nothing. Can't I just be quiet once in awhile?"

"Not like this. You're quiet sometimes and I'm cool with it, because I know you're just thinking or whatever. This isn't like that. Who upset you? Was it one of those bitches in history?"

James almost laughed, because technically he supposed it was. He'd never thought of Logan as a bitch before, but after today...well, no. That wasn't fair. "No. Kendall, it's nothing, back off."

Kendall did, for all of ten seconds. Then he started up again as they walked down the sidewalk. "Are you jealous that I got two pieces of candy from Carlos?"

"Yes. Absolutely. I'm so jealous because I really want Carlos to have a crush on me instead of you."

Kendall's lips twisted into a smirk. "Okay, I recognize sarcasm when I hear it, but let's get something straight here. Carlos does not have a crush on me."

"Oh my god, are you blind or just stupid? He so does!"

"Carlos is into girls."

"Why can't he be into both?"

"He can be, but he's not. He's always making comments about how you're so lucky to have chicks all over you all the time."

"Great, he can have them. It's so annoying. And I feel bad saying that, because I mean...they like me. It's not like they're doing anything wrong. I just...don't like them back."

"Not even one of them? I mean, dude, with all the girls who try to talk to you, there has to be one who isn't annoying."

"Nope."

"Your standards are too high."

"Maybe." He knows it's more than just maybe. His standards are _way_ too high, and that's because there's only one person who gets his heart beating fast and his palms sweaty. And that person is on a pedestal so high that the rest can't even reach his feet. "Hey, did you go through all those Valentine cards from history?"

"Yeah. I was bored in study hall. They were all pretty much the same, just 'To: Kendall, From: So and so.' Except that I got two from Carlos, and he used a million exclamation points."

James snickered. "Two, huh?"

"Shut up, it's not like that. It's because I demanded two kinds of candy."

Now it was a full chuckle. "Right. He's kind of adorable, you know?"

"He's something, alright," Kendall grinned. "Why did you ask about the Valentines?"

"Oh, just...did you get one from everybody?"

"I think so. I didn't check it against the roster, but...why wouldn't I?"

"Yeah." Why wouldn't he indeed? There was no reason for anyone to skip _him._

"Didn't you?"

James bit his lip, not wanting to admit how hurt he was about the one he actually didn't get.

"Wait, seriously?" Kendall stopped walking, reaching out to keep James from continuing on when his friend showed no signs of slowing. "Who skipped you?"

"Nobody."

"Oh, you're freaking lying. Dude, you can't hide your feelings from me, you've been upset since...yeah, now I realize it's not lunch, it's that class. So who didn't get you one? Was it Amanda? Sarah? Jenny?"

"No. It doesn't matter." James stepped away, attempting to get them walking again.

Kendall didn't allow it. His hand tightened around James' arm. "Talk to me. We're not going anywhere until you do."

Why was Kendall so aggravating? "It's not a big deal. It's Logan."

After blinking a few times, because that didn't make sense on any level, Kendall clarified, "Logan?"

"Yeah." James wrenched his arm out of Kendall's grasp and started moving. "Told you, no big deal."

Kendall followed more slowly. "That's just weird."

"Why is it weird? He probably just...I mean, I'm sure it was a..."

By the time Kendall caught up, James was showing signs of either an approaching panic attack or the desperation to keep tears at bay. "Hey. James."

"What's so wrong with me?" James suddenly yelled, spinning to face Kendall. "I've never been mean to him! I hardly even look at him, I mean not when he might be aware of it, I'm always careful to...what the fuck, Kendall? How am I not even good enough to get a stupid little piece of paper from him?"

Kendall was back to the blinking. "Oh my god. Oh my god, you have a thing for Logan."

"Shut up!" The outburst was accompanied by a shove to Kendall's chest before James stormed off while wiping at his eyes.

"James, hold on! I'm not making fun of you, will you just...?"

James showed no signs of slowing. Kendall jogged ahead and spun him around with a grip on his bicep. "Come on."

"No. I want to go home."

"Too bad, I'm buying you a sundae. Come on."

James reluctantly allowed himself to be led into a nearby fast-food restaurant they sometimes stopped at for a snack. "I don't want anyone we know to see me crying."

"Then stop crying, jackass. Hot fudge or butterscotch?"

"Hot fudge," James sniffed. "Make sure they put the nuts in there!"

"I'm on it. Go find us a table."

It took three napkins and half a sundae to return James to a state calm enough that Kendall thought it safe to broach the subject again. "Can we talk about Logan?"

"Are you gonna laugh at me?"

"No. But it explains why none of those girls get anywhere with you."

James dipped a spoon into his sundae, not meeting Kendall's eyes. "I don't really know if I'm...you know."

"That's fine. I mean, to not know. Also to be that, if that's what you decide. Not that it's a decision you make, I know it's not really something you can control, I just...man. Sorry. I'm kind of out of my element here."

"I know. I'm sorry I didn't tell you before, I just wasn't sure. You're not like that at all, you know?"

"I've never really thought about it. There aren't any guys who made me think like that. I mean there's Carlos, but it's not...I mean...okay, hold on. The thought of kissing him isn't horrible."

In spite of his current heartache, James laughed. "Watch out, buddy. That's how it starts."

"Okay, we're not talking about me. So...Logan?"

"I don't know, it's weird. I could stare at him for days. Sometimes I watch him in government, I have a perfect view from across the room. He's so focused, and so like...precise. His notebook has to be in the same spot on his desk, he always takes out two pencils. Never one, has to be two. _ And_ a highlighter. It's...go ahead and laugh, but it's adorable. And he has these _eyes_, and this_ mouth_, and he doesn't smile a lot but when he does, like when the teacher says something that makes him smile, it changes his whole face. He smiled at me. Once. I got an answer right and I was actually proud, and I looked over at him and he was watching me with this smile like he was proud, too. Ugh, he's so perfect."

"This is so weird," Kendall said with a shake of his head. "But not in a bad way! Just...weird."

"I know."

"Are you sure he didn't give you a Valentine? I mean, I got one from him."

"I checked through all of them."

"Let's look again. You probably just missed it."

Their sundaes done, Kendall shoved the trash aside to make room for James' gym bag on the table. Together they scooped out the small white envelopes that would probably end up in the trash by morning. James was about to remove the bag when Kendall said, "Hang on, there's one more."

"No, that's all of them."

"No, right there. That corner sticking up under your notebook."

With a frown James looked again, his heart skipping a beat as he tugged the corner. What appeared was definitely a card, but much larger than the rest. "What the hell. I never saw this."

"Well, it's got your name on it."

James turned it over with shaking fingers. Surely this couldn't be from Logan.

"Oh my god, will you open it already?"

"It's probably from a stupid girl."

"Just open it!"

James did, sliding out a colorful card done in bright shades of red, pink, and purple. "Oh god, it's hideous."

"See who it's from!"

Slowly he lifted the cover, eyes skimming before he deflated. He'd known it wasn't from Logan, but still the hope had been there. "No signature."

"What? Let me see that."

When Kendall reached for it, James held the card away. "Let me read the damn thing!"

Kendall's fingers impatiently tapped the table while James read, and by the time he closed the card he was blinking rapidly. "Oh my god. That's...oh my god."

"_Now_ can I see it?"

James offered no resistance, reaching for a fresh napkin once Kendall wrested the card away. Even he was shocked enough to speak in a hushed tone after reading. "Wow."

"Right?" James swallowed hard while dabbing at his eyes. "Somebody really likes me."

"_A lot_ of people really like you."

"I know, but...maybe you're right. Maybe I should give someone a chance. I mean, if there's a girl out there who can write things like that about me, I'd actually want to know her better."

Kendall stared at James as if he'd declared himself the king of England. "Are you just stupid?"

"What the hell, Kendall?"

"Where is your brain? An entire class gave you Valentines, all except one person. Instead, you got a card with no signature, and you're seriously having to ask yourself who it's from?"

"Well, yeah. It could be from anyone."

"How about from the one person who didn't give you a Valentine? Process of elimination, James. This has to be from Logan."

"Oh, yeah, right," James laughed. "Like Logan would do something like that for me? He barely knows I'm alive!"

"I'm telling you, this has to be from Logan! He's got a crush on you!"

"You're an idiot." James stood to gather their trash.

"No,_ you're_ an idiot. It makes perfectly logical sense."

"It could've been anyone, Kendall. Anybody could've slid that card into my bag when I wasn't looking."

"And just when were you not looking? Oh, let me think. Maybe when we were walking around exchanging cards in class? Did you leave your bag unattended at any other time today?"

James shook his head, then dumped the remains of their sundaes. "He wouldn't do that. That's the kind of thing someone..._not him_ does."

"Like who?"

"Like me," James sighed. He spun to face the table, red creeping into his cheeks. "I did it. To him. Today."

Kendall's jaw dropped. "You what?"

"I wrote him a poem and slipped it into his backpack today. While we were all walking around."

"Oh my god, this is...this is the best. Did you sign yours?"

"Of course not! I don't want him to know it's from me!"

While reaching for his bag, Kendall suddenly grinned. "I just had this vision."

"Do I want to know?"

"Logan's sitting at home right now, all sad because he didn't get a Valentine from you. Or...wait, did you give him a little one, too?"

"No. Oh crap, should I have? To throw him off the scent?"

"Too late now. But Logan's sitting at home all sad, because you're the one he wanted a Valentine from and he didn't get it. And then he comes across the one you stuck in his bag, and...oh, this could end badly."

"What do you mean?" James frowned. He snatched the card back from Kendall and safely stored it away before hefting his bag over his shoulder.

"Well, you assumed it was from someone else. What if he does the same? And you both are like 'Forget that asshole, he didn't give me a Valentine!' And you spend all your time trying to find the person who wrote your cards, when it was both of you the whole time?"

"Kendall, it wasn't him."

"Want me to ask Carlos?"

"No! Please, Kendall, just drop it!"

"Come on, you know you're dying to know if it was him. It has to be!"

"It wasn't!"

"Do you still have his number? From that assignment you guys did in government?"

"I'm not calling him."

"Just text him. Ask."

"No!"

"You could be holding his hand by morning."

"It's not him!"

Kendall grinned as he watched James walk out of the restaurant. James could deny it all he wanted, but Kendall knew he was dying to know if it was Logan. He just wouldn't let himself entertain the idea.

That was fine, because Kendall had a secret weapon. And if James was right, that secret weapon had a crush on him.

* * *

"Carlos, you're not focusing. I have to start dinner in thirty minutes so we need to finish your homework by then."

"I'm too busy trying to figure out who wrote you that poem! Wait, what about Debi? Have you ever gotten any signals from her?"

"Oh my god, she has a boyfriend. Look, I'm losing my patience. I'm gonna go grab us some sodas and if you haven't completed one math problem by the time I get back, I'm sending you home to fend for yourself."

Logan stormed from his bedroom without waiting for an answer. In truth he was having just as much trouble focusing, but he was better at hiding it.

He was dying to know who'd written that poem, too.

They'd discovered it in Logan's backpack upon arrival at the Mitchell home. Somehow it had gotten wedged between two books, and it wasn't until Logan unpacked those that he noticed the large red envelope with his name on it.

Confused, he'd carefully opened the flap and drew out a silly card with a dancing heart on the front accompanied by the words, "You make my heart do the boogie." Not really his thing, but the inner contents were what mattered.

On the inside flap was a poem, similar to the one he'd written for James only in that it expressed feelings that were normally hidden. The author of this one seemed to have a penchant for rhymes.

_They say love is a many splendored thing_

_I don't know what that means, but you make my heart sing_

_I make sure to hide it because I don't know what you would do_

_If you ever discovered that I'm in love with you_

_I love that your face lights up in school_

_I think your intelligence is really cool_

_I wish I could make you as happy as an A_

_If I told you I love you, what would you say?_

_Probably something with the use of big words_

_I'd need a dictionary for things I've never heards (shh, pretend it's a word)_

_As you can see, I'm not all that smart_

_But what I have to offer is a really big heart_

_Maybe one day I can hold your hand_

_Or sing you a love song with a backing band_

_For now all I can do is to keep loving you_

_From afar, in silence, wishing you were my boo_

_Anyway. Happy Valentine's Day from your secret admirer. _

_P.S. You always look super hot in that denim jacket._

It was perhaps the worst poem Logan had ever read in his life. As he'd read over it a second time, it quickly became his favorite. By the third read, it was sheer genius.

"Ooo, what's that?"

Logan had jumped and tried to shove the card back into its envelope, not having heard Carlos come back from the bathroom. "Nothing. It's nothing. Let's get going on your math because—"

"Oh, no way, this must be something good!"

It only took Carlos about five seconds to free the card from Logan's grasp, and his fear of ripping it while attempting to steal it back kept Logan from doing that. Instead he'd stood by with his face red and flaming as Carlos read the poem.

"This is...wow." Carlos laughed, then added, "But it's sweet. Is this really for you?"

"Probably got shoved into my bag by mistake." Logan had snatched it back.

"Right, that's totally what happened. Especially since it's your name on the card. Oh my god, dude, someone has a crush on you!"

"I'm sure it's a joke."

"It's not a joke, they even mentioned your denim jacket."

"Whatever."

"Do you think it came from someone in history? Or another class? When did it show up?"

"It doesn't matter. Let's just get going on homework."

"Okay, but it wasn't there before lunch, right? Because you would've seen it when..."

The next hour went on in that vein, Carlos randomly tossing out theories about the card while Logan forced his attention back to homework. Logan really needed time alone to read it again, to try to analyze the lines, to figure out who would write something of that nature. Not an honors student, obviously, it was definitely someone more...average.

But average could be okay. Not that Logan felt that word could describe James, but he supposed in a mental sense, James might be considered by most to be average. So...average had its perks.

_It's not from James. You're being an idiot. Not only is James Diamond very obviously into girls, he wouldn't look twice at you even if he wasn't. He'd go for someone like Kendall. Or even Carlos, because Carlos is at least fun. You're not his type at all._

"I got it!" Carlos exclaimed once Logan returned to the room.

"You'd better be talking about number six on that worksheet."

"No, dude, it has to be someone in band."

"Band?" Logan halted, curious in spite of himself. "Why band?"

"Or I guess it could be choir. But that line about a backing band. It has to be someone musical."

Carlos might be on to something there. Logan set down Carlos' soda and pondered that.

_James_ was musical. James played piano in their school's jazz band. James was also in choir.

"_Or sing you a love song with a backing band"_

No, what was Logan thinking? It wasn't James!

"Who do we know that's in choir or band?"

"Hey, Carlos, how about you either finish that worksheet or I send you home?"

Carlos almost spit out the drink he'd taken. "James! James does both!"

Logan's heart stuttered. "That's not even funny."

"Come on, it makes sense! And...wait, didn't you say he didn't give you a Valentine?"

"Carlos, I'm serious. Math. Now."

"Dude, it has to be him! That's why he didn't give you a Valentine, he gave you this instead!"

"I'm five seconds away from—"

"I'm gonna text Kendall and ask." Carlos reached into his pocket.

"Oh my god, no! Why can't you just let this go?"

"Because somebody likes you! And you can say what you want, but I know you love that poem. We have to find your secret admirer! If somebody was into me, I'd jump on that so fast!"

"I'm not you, okay? I'm fine with not knowing who—"

"Oh, look at that. Kendall already texted me."

Logan froze. "Kendall? He texted you? Since when does he text you?"

"Not once since that time he picked me up for hockey. But he did today. Let's see what it says, shall we?" Carlos was grinning widely, enjoying Logan's discomfort. He cleared his throat and read, "'Hey, did Logan give James a card in class today?'"

Now Logan couldn't breathe.

"What kind of question is that? Of course you did. Let me just—"

"Carlos, wait." The serious tone made Carlos pause. "I...I didn't."

"You what?"

"I didn't. Give him a card. I mean...I did, just not..."

Carlos' gaze narrowed at the paleness of Logan's face. "You didn't give him a Valentine?"

"I...oh god. I'm gonna throw up."

"Dude, whoa, relax. Come sit down." Carlos stood from the desk chair, waiting until Logan was in it to try again. "What did you give him?"

"A card. Like...like the one I got. With...I wrote a poem and everything. I like James, okay? You can make fun of me for it later, but for right now don't answer Kendall's question."

"Whoa." It took Carlos some time to wrap his head around the new information. "I can't just ignore him. Did you sign the card?"

"No. I don't want him to know it's from me."

"Then what's the point of giving it?"

"I don't know, it seemed like a good idea at the time but now I'm realizing it was stupid because of course he's going to know it was me. If I'm the only one who didn't give him a Valentine..."

"Okay, stop panicking. Here, drink some of your soda." Once Logan did, Carlos asked, "What do you want me to say to Kendall?"

"Um. Ask him what he means."

Carlos thought it over and sent,_ "You mean the little Valentine ones?"_

"_Yeah. James said he didn't get anything from Logan."_

Carlos gasped. "James told Kendall you didn't get him a card."

"He did? He actually noticed?"

"James is your secret admirer," Carlos singsonged. "He has to be! What should I say?"

"Just...tell him...tell him you don't know."

"That's a lie."

"Carlos, you lie to your teachers all the time!"

"Yeah, but I can't lie to Kendall! He won't like me then!"

"Please don't tell him, Carlos. James can't know."

After giving it more thought, Carlos tried, _"Logan said James didn't give him one either."_

"_Are you with Logan right now?"_

"_Yeah. Are you with James?"_

"_Yeah. James doesn't want me to tell you this, but he did do something for Logan."_

"_I knew it! Logan doesn't want ME to tell YOU this, but he did do something for James."_

"_Poem?"_

"_Yep. Poem?"_

"_Yep. James is being dumb and won't believe that it's Logan."_

"_Logan's being dumb, too. What do we do?"_

"_Let's plan something. Maybe like a movie date, the four of us. I'll tell James it's because I want to hang out with you but don't want to go alone."_

"_Friday! Let's do it Friday! Me and Logan were gonna go to the movies anyway!"_

"_Tomorrow. Perfect. Make sure Logan comes."_

"_Make sure James comes. We'll talk about it tomorrow in history!"_

"_Yeah, somehow I don't think they'll have a problem with it. So Logan really has a thing for James?"_

"_I just found out. James likes Logan?"_

"_Apparently. I had no idea."_

"_They're so dumb. Did you like your Valentines?"_

"_Eating one right now. Which do you prefer, chocolate or gummy?"_

"_Why?"_

"_I might bring you something tomorrow night. If you're lucky. ;)"_

With a huge grin, Carlos replied_, "I like both. It's a date. ;)"_

"What are you smiling about?" Logan asked suspiciously.

"Nothing," Carlos answered. "Just thinking about the movies tomorrow. So I need help on number six, I'm confused by the power sign."

Though Logan wasn't quite satisfied with that explanation, he let the matter drop. It was safer when Carlos was talking about math than James anyway.

Maybe it was time to forget about James. The guy couldn't even manage to remember him among a roster of classmates. Maybe his future was with whoever had written him that cheesy but so-adorable poem.

Suddenly Logan couldn't wait for Valentine's Day to be over so he could focus on the new chapter, and whatever the author of that poem might bring into his life.


	3. Chapter 3

A/N—Reminder that I don't own these characters and that all credit goes to the creators of "Big Time Rush."

So because so many of you wanted to know what would happen next, I wrote one more chapter. This will be the last, though. It's not my best work and I didn't have my beta look it over because I wanted it posted today, so forgive any errors. But here you go! This picks up on the same day. And thank you again for reading this. :)

I should be back to posting "Magic" Friday, for those reading that one.

* * *

Before bed that night, Carlos couldn't resist sending a text to Kendall. It wasn't like he_ liked_ Kendall, not like that. It was more that Kendall was...he was...

Okay, so maybe Carlos couldn't come up with the right words for it. He didn't want to waste time worrying about whatever it was, so he pushed it out of his mind and composed a text. _"How are we doing this tomorrow?"_

Surprisingly, an answer came back almost immediately. _"I've got a plan. Just go along with me in history, and don't freak out if I act weird. It's all to get them together."_

"_Act weird how?"_

"_Don't worry about it. Just trust me."_

Carlos could do that. He didn't know Kendall all that well, but never hesitated to follow his advice on the ice because Kendall knew what he was doing. There was no reason to doubt that Kendall knew what he was doing everywhere else, as well._ "Okay! See you tomorrow!"_

"_Bye, Valentine. ;)"_

A shocked giggle came out of Carlos. He knew Kendall was just teasing him, but it still made his heart flutter.

Nobody was cooler than Kendall.

* * *

Carlos was hiding something. Logan always knew when he had a secret he was keeping because there were little signs of excitement he couldn't control—tapping fingers, a bouncing knee, random humming that drove Logan insane. Even furtive glances, as he'd just done from his desk.

Finally Logan couldn't take it anymore. "Is my mom planning a surprise party for me?"

The fingers stopped their tapping. "Surprise party? For what? Your birthday's not until after summer. Unless...did I forget your birthday?"

Logan waited a few seconds to answer, enjoying the panic on Carlos' face. Good, let him be the one suffering for a change. "No, but you're hiding something, and that's usually what it means. That Mom has something planned for me and it's killing you to keep it a secret."

"That is so not true!" Carlos argued.

His gaze shot to the door when a student walked in, and it was then that Logan realized he'd been doing that every ten seconds or so. Carlos was waiting for someone. A suspicion formed that made his blood run cold. "Did you tell Kendall about the card?"

"Card?"

Carlos might as well have asked "What's a card?" Logan's stomach dropped.

There was no time to react, though, because just then Kendall whistled his way into the room. James was close behind, seemingly deep in thought. No casual glance around the room this time, just that graceful walk to his desk. Logan sat up straighter but kept his eyes averted. It still hurt that James had skipped him, and no amount of arguing from Carlos would convince him that the poem had come from his crush.

Kendall's lips curved up into a wide grin as he approached his own desk. "Well, well, well. If it isn't the Candy Man."

"Did you like the gummies?" Carlos asked, his smile just as wide. "I got a whole bag this morning on the way to school. If you're interested."

"Oh, I am _so _interested." Kendall dropped into his desk and set down his gym bag before spinning to face Carlos. He held out a hand, waiting patiently while Carlos dug into his backpack.

As Logan watched the interaction, everything fell into place. Carlos' secret wasn't about him, but about Kendall. About _himself._ Somehow Logan had missed that Carlos had a crush on Kendall. He'd been too wrapped up in his own feelings for James to notice. No wonder Carlos hadn't made a big deal about Logan's admission that he was gay.

They'd definitely have to talk about this after school.

"Thanks," Kendall said now, that teasing grin still on his face as he stared back at Carlos. "I'll buy you something at the movies tonight to make it up to you. Maybe we can share a soda."

Carlos' eyes lit up, but Logan was too stuck on "at the movies tonight" to care about that. "The movies? Carlos, I thought we were going to the movies tonight."

"Oh. Logan. I forgot to tell you, me and Kendall—"

That was as far as he got, because Miss Newton distracted them all by beginning class. For once, Logan couldn't have cared less about history. "Me and Kendall" what? Were going together? _Dating?_ What the hell had Logan missed? Did James know about this?

James hadn't said a word since taking his seat. His shoulders were rigid today, not relaxed like they usually were. A hand ran absently through his beautiful, shiny hair.

_Forget about James. He doesn't matter. He didn't even remember you yesterday._

A folded piece of paper landed on Logan's desk. He bent forward to hide the movements behind James' broad shoulders as he opened it.

"_Sorry. Me and Kendall are going together tonight but I still want you to come. Please come! I'm nervous!"_

Logan blinked a few times. It certainly did sound like a date. He wrote back. _"You and Kendall are a thing?"_

Normally not one to be passing notes in class, as he was always afraid of getting into trouble for it, Logan wrapped the square of paper around a pencil as if passing one to Carlos. The answer eventually came back in a rushed scribble.

"_He's my Valentine. Please come!" _

"_He doesn't want to be alone with you?"_

"_He said it's cool if you come!"_

How did Logan always get roped into these things? He really needed to learn how to say no.

He had to admit, though, that his curiosity was piqued. Kendall had never given off gay vibes, and if someone like him could be into guys, that meant anyone could.

Even gorgeous boys who had girls surrounding them constantly.

_Stop it. Even if he is, he's not into you. He didn't even remember you for a class project. Forget about him, Logan._

"_Fine. We'll talk about it after school."_

Carlos read that, but the next note was poked against Kendall's elbow. He reached back for it and unfolded the sheet before smirking down at the words Carlos had written.

"_He said yes. Get James there!"_

James would argue, but Kendall wasn't worried about it; he always knew how to handle James.

* * *

James had been quiet most of the day, and Kendall knew he was still hurting over the Logan thing. Attempts to get him talking had mostly failed. It was this in addition to the knowledge that James would want nothing to do with his crush that told Kendall it was going to be difficult to talk him into the movie date, but it had to be done. They'd be at his house soon, and he'd put it off long enough. Kendall braced himself for a fight before diving in. "I need your help with something."

"What's up?"

"So...I don't really know how to say this, it's weird to even think about. But...I have a date tonight."

James' footsteps faltered. "A date?"

"Yeah. Obviously I'm kind of scared about the whole thing, and I could really use you there to get me through it."

Now the footsteps stopped completely as James turned to look at Kendall. "You want to take me along on...your date?"

Kendall nodded. "I already talked to him about it, and he's cool with it. I think we're both a little nervous, and having someone else there kind of...you know. Eases the tension."

James reacted as if Kendall was speaking a foreign language. Confusion touched his bright hazel eyes. "Him? You're going out with a guy?"

"Yeah, did you not...how did you miss that whole conversation I had with Carlos in history?"

James' face screwed up; he tried to remember. "I...sorry. I was a little distracted in history."

"You've been a little distracted all day. Can we talk about Logan?"

"No." It was final, brooking no argument. "I don't even want to think about him again."

"Okay, but...haven't you been thinking about him all day?"

James shook his head, not in denial but frustration. "I'm trying to get over it and tell myself it's no big deal. But it still hurts. Why can't I just be happy that someone cares about me enough to write an awesome poem like that? Why am I still pissed off that it wasn't him?"

"Well, I still think it was him. But you won't believe me, so..."

"Because it wasn't. And I don't want to get my hopes up for something that will never happen."

"Fine. Then come with me tonight so I'm not sitting there terrified to even talk to Carlos, and—"

"Wait, Carlos? _ Carlos?_"

"James, where have you been?"

"Yesterday you didn't even believe he has a crush on you."

"Well, things change. I asked him to the movies and he said yes. Now will you come with me or not?"

"Does he know it's a date?"

"Obviously. I promise after this, we'll go on dates alone. I just...you know. This is my first, and I'm scared, and—"

"Dammit, Kendall."

It was hard to fight the smile that wanted to surface, because Kendall knew why James was angry; he couldn't resist a plea to be there for his best friend.

"Please, James."

"So I'm just supposed to sit there and watch you two make out while I feel sorry for myself?"

"Who says we're gonna make out?"

"He's dying to experience all that, remember what he said in class the other day? He so wants a...boyfriend, I guess."

"Well, we'll see how it goes. I need you. Just come with me."

"Oh my god, you so owe me."

"Anything you want. Now let's hurry, because we have to be at the theater in a few hours and you'll need time to do your hair and...whatever else you do to make yourself beautiful."

"Why do I need to look good? Carlos isn't gonna care."

"Because you never know what the night has in store. Mom's gonna drop us off, so I'll be at your place around 5:30."

"Whatever."

It was as good as Kendall was going to get. He almost felt bad about not telling James that Logan would be there, because James would die at looking less-than-perfect in front of his crush.

He'd just have to count on James' innate need to _always _look good.

* * *

"_We're here. Want popcorn?"_

Carlos' foot stopped tapping and he hopped up from the seat to pocket his phone. "He's here! Want anything else?"

Logan shook his head, satisfied with the soda he'd purchased. He just wanted the night to be over.

"Okay, I'm gonna go get him. He's buying me popcorn! Save our seats!"

Like Logan wouldn't? He rolled his eyes, and soon enough was blessedly alone—or as alone as he could get in a movie theater full of people. That lasted longer than he expected, and he was actually starting to worry when the lights dimmed for previews and Carlos had still not returned with Kendall.

"_Where are you?"_ he sent.

"_The line was long! We're coming now!"_

Two minutes later Carlos clumsily made his way past Logan's knees, dragging Kendall along by his free hand. In the dark, Kendall nodded at Logan with a grin. Logan did the same before a soft gasp left him when James halted in shock to stare down with wide eyes.

"Sit down!" Kendall hissed.

James didn't look away. Neither did Logan. Kendall tried again.

"James! Sit your ass down!"

There was only one empty seat, and it was conveniently next to Logan. Still off balance, he sank into it awkwardly and stared straight ahead, both hands wrapped around the bag of popcorn on his lap.

The movie had started by the time Logan found his voice. He leaned over to whisper into Carlos' ear. "Did you do this? Did you know he was coming?"

"No, dude! Kendall needed a buddy, too! Just watch the movie!"

_Just watch the movie._ Like Logan was supposed to focus on anything when James' shoulder was touching his? When their hands were inches apart? When he could turn his head and see the face he dreamed about so close to his own?

Logan sucked down his soda as if it would give him strength. How was he supposed to survive two hours of this torture? The guy couldn't be bothered with him in class. Surely he wanted to be anywhere but next to the nerd that wrote him a stupidly pathetic lovesick poem.

Then again...James didn't know he'd written that. Maybe this would be okay. Maybe James had assumed it was one of the many girls that threw themselves at him on a daily basis. As far as James knew, Logan was just a random student he shared a few classes with.

"Want some?"

Logan barely picked up the words, which came out mumbled and quiet. He glanced to his left. James wasn't looking at him, but the bag of popcorn was definitely tipped toward him. Not normally a fan of popcorn, was Logan going to turn down the chance to share something with James?

_Hell no._

"Thanks," he whispered back while reaching in for a handful. James balanced the bag between them in an obvious offer to take more, and Logan started to relax. James didn't hate him. Maybe Carlos was right, maybe it had just been a mistake.

He peeked over at Carlos to find that his best friend was leaning the other way, his weight resting against Kendall's arm. Kendall didn't seem to mind at all, and why would he? Apparently _he _was on a date.

If only Logan could be so lucky. James was sitting right next to him, sharing popcorn, and if he closed his eyes and pretended hard enough, this almost felt like a double date. He reached into the popcorn again, James doing the same, and their fingers brushed together.

What Logan would give for this to have been a date.

* * *

_each brush of my fingers against your skin, or even your clothing, is my heart sharing without words that I wish to love you._

The words floated into James' mind, and he wished suddenly that Logan _had _written the poem, because that would mean that the seemingly innocent touch was Logan saying "I love you."

James was too romantic for his own good. He hid it well most of the time, but occasionally something stupid slipped out of his mouth like it had in class the other day.

_"There's someone out there for everyone."_

Had he really said that in front of Logan? God, Logan must have been laughing on the inside. Logan didn't care about love and feelings. He couldn't even hand out Valentines to everyone in class. Probably skipped a bunch of students because he found the project stupid.

James could only imagine how much he'd laughed at the poem. The mere idea of it choked James up.

But it was fine. Logan didn't know he'd written the poem. Only one person did, and James trusted Kendall to keep his secret to the grave. Kendall would never betray him like that.

So okay. This was just two dudes helping out their friends. So what if Logan didn't give him a Valentine? Maybe he'd just taken it all too personally. Maybe he could at least enjoy the time they did have together tonight, and if their fingers continued to brush together "accidentally"?

James would just let himself pretend it was an expression of love.

* * *

Their hands came into contact more and more frequently as the movie played on and the popcorn disappeared. James found it adorable that Logan wiped his fingers on a napkin after each dip into the bag. Logan found it adorable that James wiped his fingers on his jeans, at least until he was offered a napkin. James took it with a shy smile and a whispered "Thanks" that sent Logan's heart all over the place.

Eventually they got down to the kernels. When there was just enough left for one more handful of popped corn, James offered the bag to Logan. He declined, and James finished off the remains before setting the bag on the floor near his feet. Both were sorry to see it go, as it had been their only excuse to touch.

Kendall and Carlos were now holding hands, and it sparked a wave of jealousy in Logan that made him ashamed. Now that the popcorn was gone, he had no reason to reach for James. Instead he reached for his soda, realizing with disappointment that he was sucking in mostly air.

And suddenly, they had a reason to touch again. James was offering his drink to Logan. Logan took it with a "thanks" of his own, and then it was set between them so that they could both reach. James' fingers remained lightly against the cup, not moving away when Logan's brushed against them to lift it to his lips. He set the cup down again, and this time he didn't move his hand away either.

His fingers slid between James'. James used his own to squeeze once, and next thing Logan knew, they were officially holding hands.

_Maybe one day I can hold your hand _

The poem ran through his mind. It was the worst time, since James certainly didn't view their touches the way he did, but...

So what. They were holding hands. He was going to enjoy it while it lasted.

* * *

By the time the credits rolled, Logan's head was on James' shoulder and James' cheek against Logan's hair. Neither wanted to move.

Kendall leaned in to whisper to Carlos, "I think our plan's working."

Carlos peeked over and smiled before lifting his face. "You should kiss me. Since the hand thing worked."

Kendall's eyes danced. "We'll save that for when they're actually watching us. Hungry?"

They'd just devoured a large bucket of popcorn and two boxes of candy. "Starving!"

"Let me buy you dinner."

"This is totally the best fake date ever."

"Right?" Kendall grinned. He leaned across Carlos. "We're going out for food."

Logan jumped slightly, having been lost in a happy place. He sat up, pleased when James tightened his grip rather than let go of his hand. "Where?"

"Wherever Carlos wants. As long as it's within walking distance."

James stood up, Logan easily going along with the movement and making sure to keep James' hand in his. "Carlos loves the spaghetti place across the street."

"So does James," Kendall said. "Sound good, buddy?"

Rather than answer, James asked, "Logan? You uh...is that okay? I'll buy."

And though Logan had plenty of money to cover his own dinner, James paying made it feel more like a date. "I'd love that. Thanks."

James' smile was a cross between lovesick and "I can't believe this is happening!" Kendall recognized it, Carlos found it a welcome change from the "I'm too cool to care" expression James normally wore, and Logan...

Logan held on tighter as they walked, still amazed that James wasn't trying to take his hand back.

* * *

Conversation over dinner was easy. They talked of school, and about themselves, each learning more about the families and motivations that made them the young men they were growing into. Kendall shared his Chicken Fettuccine Alfredo with Carlos, who'd ordered his usual spaghetti and meatball plate. James sampled Logan's lasagna while loving that throughout the meal Logan was pressed up against him. There was plenty of room for Logan to scoot over, but he never did.

For this reason, James did something daring once their plates had been cleared away. He slid his arm around Logan's back, settling his hand at Logan's waist. Logan immediately snuggled in closer, and then James finally accepted it.

Whatever was happening between them, it was mutual. Logan liked him.

Enough to write a poem like that about him, though? Surely not. Kendall was still crazy to even suggest it.

This, though...this wasn't so bad either.

Before he was ready for it, Kendall was stating that he'd just texted his mother to pick them up. James wanted the night to go on forever. "Already?"

"Yeah, dude, sorry. You know she won't let me stay out past ten."

"This sucks," Carlos complained. "But my mom's the same way. We should do this again! Maybe after the game tomorrow. That would give us all day!"

Logan usually spent his Saturday afternoons on schoolwork, but if James was willing... "Are you free?" he asked, lifting his head for an answer. James' lips were almost close enough to taste when he replied.

"I could be. I was supposed to get together with some choir buddies, but..."

"Oh, I don't want to mess up your plans."

"Trust me, I'd much rather hang out with you." There was a pause, and then James looked away. "_All_ of you. I meant all of you."

Kendall rolled his eyes with a smirk. "Uh huh. Well, this half of all of us is down. My house isn't all that exciting, but we could hang out there. Order pizza, play some games...just...you know. Hang out."

"That sounds rad!" Carlos exclaimed. "I don't care what you guys do, I'm there."

"Fine with me," James shrugged, pulling Logan closer. "If...I mean...are you cool with that?"

Logan would've preferred to be alone with James, but there was still part of him that feared he was reading too much into everything. What if James was just being friendly? What if he was just going along with all of this for Kendall's sake? "Sure."

"Cool, you can all just come home with me after the game." Kendall moved out of the booth, signaling the end of dinner. "Come on, Mom should be here in a few minutes. Do you guys need a ride?"

"I'm staying over at Logan's," Carlos answered. "And he's two blocks away, so we're good. But we'll wait with you guys."

James seemed fine with that idea, again securing Logan's hand in his as they ventured into the cold night to wait at the front of the restaurant. His light jacket had been fine before sundown, but now it felt like nothing against the wind that had kicked up.

A shiver didn't go unnoticed by James. "Cold?"

"I'm fine."

Luckily, James saw through the lie. He slid his arms around Logan, wrapping him up tight and ecstatic when Logan returned the gesture.

"Damn, they beat us to that," Carlos commented. "We haven't even really hugged yet."

"We're slacking." Kendall remedied that, hugging Carlos to him. "So I'd say this was a success?"

"They're ridiculous. It would've been so much easier if they just believed us when we told them who wrote the poems."

"True, but then I wouldn't have gotten to buy you dinner."

"Yeah, that was my favorite part."

"Seriously? Not me holding your hand or cuddling with you during the movie? I thought you loved all that romance stuff."

Carlos shrugged, making an "eh" sound. "Try harder."

Outraged, Kendall took the challenge. He dipped Carlos back and kissed him, Carlos shocked by the move but quickly getting over that to kiss Kendall back. And just like that he realized he'd been wrong. He did like Kendall _like that_.

"Wow," James whispered over Logan's shoulder.

"What?"

James spun them so that Logan could see. "Oh. Wow."

"Yeah, I didn't...I mean...this is going to sound crazy, but there was a part of me that was thinking they set this whole thing up to get us together."

Logan stepped back in surprise. "Me, too! Did you know I was coming?"

"No! Kendall didn't tell me."

"Carlos didn't tell me, either. And he had this stupid idea that...well, never mind. But I was wondering the same thing. Guess we were both wrong."

"Guess so." James bit his lip, thinking again of the poem and wishing it had been from Logan. But Kendall was crazy, right? It wasn't like he could just come right out and ask Logan, because when the answer was a no he'd feel stupid for mentioning it. Unless there was a way he could ask without actually asking. Or maybe...tell without actually telling. He cleared his throat and said, "They uh...they say love is a many-splendored thing."

The words physically jolted Logan so that he started. James reached out to steady him, but Logan stepped further away as if terrified. "I'm sorry," James stammered. "I thought maybe...listen, if you don't want to hang out tomorrow, we don't have to. They don't need us anymore, we could just—"

"James."

Now silent, James couldn't even manage to look Logan in the eyes.

"I want to hang out."

"You do?" Hope was back, pressing James to step close again.

This time Logan allowed it, reaching out to take both of James' hands in his. "Yeah. Because...because now that I know your radiance, I could not live without it."

A look of wonder settled over James' face. Shaking fingers loosened their grip from Logan's so that they could cup his cheek, and Logan smiled as he lifted up onto his toes to meet the soft kiss coming from his Valentine.


End file.
